Day 16

You have to love yourself! You can be the best version of yourself. For me, this week has been focused on rest and meditation. My school is on mid-winter break, and I am taking the opportunity to take care of myself. I’ve been sleeping more and taking the time every day to meditate. I even did my nails (stay posted for my acrylic review). You have to realize that you are worth taking care of. That is the first step to having any sort of healthy relationship. You have to love yourself the most. Take time to take care of you.

   
 

Acceptance

You really just have to make the best out of every possible situation. Think positive about everything in your life. Every relationship you have is positive, in some light and you have to view it as such. Your world is how you view it and accepting what you cannot change is part of the process. You cannot make anyone do anything, so just accept all as they are.  Make a change and start with yourself. Accepting your worth and that you deserve to be as happy as possible are two of the most important ways to start loving yourself. You are a person, just like everyone else, who longs to be loved and accepted. Accept and love yourself first which make relationships easier. Enjoy life. Stay healthy and happy. Remember that change is inevitable.

Space

Every relationship needs space. Space is healthy and really just allows you to think about yourself. I don’t mean that in vain, it’s positive. You have to allow yourself alone time to think. Light thinking of course, such as thinking about what you’d like the relationship to become. Over-thinking can be toxic to any relationship you have. Remember to trust, love and have patience in all relationships. You have to take time to see if you are happy alone. Be honest with yourself. Yes, of course, the other person will cross your mind, so prepare for that. You should really take the time to soul search. See if you would like to continue the relationship. Many have suggested that when you take a break, you have to announce it. Unexpected breaks allow you to see how the person really feels though. You can see if they will make attempts to contact you. Expected breaks can also allow for formations of new relationships, so if you are okay with that go ahead with the break. Be considerate of everyone else’s feelings also. You cannot just decide to no longer care about their feelings, even if they don’t care about yours. Being the bigger person is not always easy but in the end it’s the better path. Do not seek revenge. Revenge and jealousy are ugly, negative and nasty emotions. Be happy with your new place in life and wish the other person the best. I suggest you think about happiness. You should want the other person to be happy, as much as possible. Just like you want them to think about your happiness. So you should acknowledge that if they are not happy with you, they could be happier with someone else. Allow them to move on, it’s always for the best. If it is meant to be it will happen. Keep in mind that you deserve the best as does your other. Be considerate and kind, it will get you farther in life than you’ll ever imagine.

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Think Different

What is a title? Pertaining to a relationship, it’s a symbol. The symbol is to “describe expectations and how you communicate”. Society has decided that we are to label each and every relationship, even friendships. For example, a best friend is better than just being a friend with someone. The word best has a lot of meaning in the phrase, to the point where I was referred to as a “friend” by one of my closest friends (I’ve been friends with her almost nine years), and I was offended. The whole idea of being offended is ridiculous, because I know how close we are and how our relationship functions. It’s the fact that I felt I deserved a higher title (a title which I have by the way). Looking back at the moment I feel silly. Everyone has decided that the title is so important that every relationship we have needs one. I challenge you to go without the title. I want you to really see how your relationship functions, if you remove the desire for a title that society has placed upon us. Every relationship is different so embrace the differences and allow yourself to enjoy your relationship. See what happens when you allow your counterpart to take over. Look for hints and allow space. Don’t over think the situation, just take it for what it is. Allow yourself to trade “roles”, so that you can see if you really like how this person treats you. It’s not the easiest thing, due to the pattern you’ve already created in your head but try. You can do it. Allow your counterpart to do what they would like to do, and if you are not okay with something they do, think on it. Wait a full day, before bringing it up to see how you truly feel about their action. Yes, they will be confused about why you are talking about yesterday, just explain to them what you’ve done. This part was especially difficult for me, but with time has gotten easier. I have a habit of getting mad easily, but I decided that not everything is worth fighting for and that sometimes you just have to acknowledge how you felt, not argue over it. Everything doesn’t have to be a fight, it’s unhealthy for both of you. Communication is everything (specifically how you deliver your message). If you are angry and harsh, the person will react defensively. Just talk to them, be kind (treat others how you would like to be treated). Soul search, find out what you like and don’t like about the relationship. Most important, recall all the times you were happy with them and hold on to those memories. Happiness is most important in all relationships and distancing yourself from the person will really allow you to see how happy you are without them. I hope you all learn from my challenge, feel free to write your results  in the comments or email me.

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