maximize opportunities

our world has changed.

so what do we do know?

at first it can seem overwhelming to be at home, have more time to ponder and be unsure of what is going on in the world. here are some tips that i’ve used to create a smooth transition to this new life.

• clean your space- i started staying at home last Thursday and have thus far left the house twice (three times if you include that i got things from the store, brought them home and then went back out to the store). the first thing i did was clean. i disinfected and washed everything. it made me feel better and left my home a lot cleaner. everyday i have time scheduled in to clean so it’s not overwhelming. yesterday i cleaned the kitchen. today i cleaned my closets. tomorrow i’ll organize the kitchen and my desk. a little cleaning each day has made me feel so much better
• create a routine- these last few days i have strictly done no work and just taken time for myself. now that i’m ready to start working, i need a plan. i used the time block method so i have a calendar stating what i will do at what time. i know i thrive on schedules and want to maximize my time.
• do what makes me happy- yoga, eating good food, meditation, doing my hair and interactions with my loved ones make me happy. so i have carved out time for my favorite things within my schedule. a yoga studio i was thinking about doing YTT (yoga teacher training) at is currently offering free classes via YouTube. I did one today, as well as my own personal practice and it felt so good!
• invest in a passion- i’ve decided that i’m going to publish my poetry book i started last year during this time. i also have been wanting to rebrand myself (connecting my blog more to IG and possibly expanding into YouTube). so i’ll be working on content creation!
• healthy habits- “I’m only going to eat 1 cookie today.” and then you actually only eat one cookie. take this time to create healthy habits- working out, drinking at least 64 ounces of water a day, or even doing yoga. these are things people say they want to do, but claim they don’t have time. i get it- i never work out either. but i’ve decided i have no reason to not work out and will be doing so. struggling with your natural hair? take this time to learn it! check out my blog post ( for my hair care regimen!
• creating firm boundaries- mostly with yourself and others. the consumption of fake news is at an all time high. choosing to not engage may be for the best. other boundaries can be harder but more worthwhile- choosing to eat 1 cookie instead of 3 is a good example.
• get some sleep- last but not least! get some sleep! taking care of your body is so so important! this is a time to rest and recharge! take advantage of it!


these last few months have been filled with unexpected blessings. and honestly, i finally feel like i’m reaping what i have sown. I graduate in 6 days. I move to go to graduate school in 20. I start my grad program in less than a month. i’ve learned to manage my anxiety. i bought a car. i’m moving to be on my own. i brought my girlfriend over for thanksgiving to meet my family. my best friend since i was 9 became an aka and i got to be there. i stood up to protect spaces for black students within UM. i will be graduating with honors. and i will be going to grad school for free (this is yet to be confirmed, i’m just putting it out there (see blog post on law of attraction). and i went to yoga five times this past week. i gained the weight back i lost and am on a currently dairy free and low sugar diet (diet meaning lifestyle in this context). i am battling my stomach issues with love and am confident i will find a regimen where i will be pain free (again, law of attraction).

so as i reflect on this year and how hard it was for me, i have realized one major thing. i learned how to be alone. 

i learned how to love myself, each and every bit. i learned to laugh at my mistakes and forgive myself for them. and while it might sound quaint, it wasn’t easy. if you would’ve talked to me in the first few months of 2019, i would’ve told you it was the worst time of my life. and it was. 21 has been the hardest year of my life, but yet one of the sweetest because i put in so much love into myself. i stopped pouring into others. that’s not my job nor has it ever been. it is my job to pour into myself and teach others how to pour into themselves. this was hard  because i had to learn how to take care of myself. you see, i had unhealthy patterns, which were formed as a response to some trauma if i’m being honest. i was codependent on those close to me. i ended up being in this sort of isolation, where i had to learn myself. it literally was like my world was falling apart. and granted- it was. but i can sit here and talk about it because i learned from it. and i’m happy it did; for now i have this life i love.

i had to create a strict regimen to take care of myself. meditation twice a day, three meals a day, nine hours of sleep, a gallon of water a day, hair washed weekly, no sex, no alcohol, no drugs, and yoga three times a week. i would force myself to get up. it was hard. and i forced myself because i knew that it was my job to take care of me, so i had to really learn how to do it. last semester, i spent a lot of time alone. for the first time ever really. i had time to think and decide what i wanted. and by the end of the semester i forreal still didn’t know. over the summer i did a similar regimen and same for this semester. it’s kept me on track. i enrolled in group therapy as well as individual, to learn how to manage my anxiety. i created healthy boundaries with those close to me, so i could have maintain my space while being with others. i had to learn to let myself be loved; that was very scary, because i had gotten so used to being alone.

i’m learning right now how to forgive people. i’ve created an action plan which involves stepping away from the situation, reevaluating it, talking it out (not to necessarily follow others advise, but to hear it aloud for myself) and writing/painting. i’ve turned to art as a healing force as well as yoga and meditation.

but most of all, i make an effort to think about what i truly want. and how i can get that. and now it’s like i’m at this point where i have to be willing to take the leap. i’m moving across the country. like packing up my life and moving. and while i’m super excited cause the grad program was my #1 choice, i’m starting over. and i pray this new life is all i wanted and more.

i know it will be because for once i’m getting to know mayah and figuring out what she likes. who she is, how she identifies, what makes her happy, what makes her sad. it’s like i can truly feel again. it’s like i’ve became the person i always wanted to be. and the crazy part is, i’m elevating and will only go higher.


so after my last blog post, something just clicked. the light bulb turned on, and now i feel ready to deal with my past.

i reached the lowest point i ever had last semester and since then i’ve been climbing. and now i’m at a high i’ve never been to. i’ve never had this opportunity before. i am now at a place where i can build relationships and truly love myself and others. you see after i was so broken, i was scared to grow close to anyone. the person i trusted, broke my trust. but you see it wasn’t all their fault. that was just the tip of the iceberg. it brought out all the insecurities i had- about not feeling good enough, a feeling i was too familiar with.

but this was just the beginning. i have grown so much this past year. i know that before i turned 21 i prayed to grow, but Lord knows I didn’t think i would this much.

you see i was isolated last semester because i had to learn to stand on my own two feet. to make decisions for myself without consulting someone else and to be proud of what i had created, no matter what. but after being that broken i was scared- to trust and to love. i’ve been learning daily that i am allowed to love myself and others, which was something i was terrified of. during my isolation, i learned how to take care of myself. i had it down to a T- i knew what i needed to calm myself down from a panic attack. but i didn’t know how to allow others to support me.

so that’s what I hope this semester is full of. i hope that i learn to remember that i have people that want to support me, but that i have to speak up. and that it’s okay to ask for help or to double text. that i have a support system that is bigger and stronger than i’ve ever had before.

i can do this. and now, i think i’m ready. i’m going to keep up with my self care routine and get into therapy. but i am going to do this knowing i am loved and deserve to be. that i am good enough, that i always have been and that i always will be.

protective styles

protective styles help your hair grow because they help you retain moisture and reduce manipulation. the biggest question is: how do i choose the right one? for me, I started with braids because I knew braids worked for my hair. as a little girl, I wore braids all the time and it grew my hair out. I always only used my natural hair, so i didn’t consider adding weave to my hair. while i do think weaves are beneficial, it’s just not for me. so I used to braid my hair often, until one of my friends twisted my hair. I barely shed at all and my hair lasted very well. Since then, twists have been my go to protective style. Here are some examples of how I do my hair!

These two pictures are my current hair style! I did three french braids after washing and deep conditioning. I then pinned them up and made it into a halo braid. I’m currently on day 2, and my hair is looking great!

This was my style last week! I washed, deep conditioned then flat twisted my hair. For work, I pinned the flat twists up, into a halo twist.

These last three are results from a flat twist out as well. I always flat twist to make sure my roots are moisturized and catch the curl.

I’ve found that picking a protective style that looks like your natural curl pattern makes the style last longer! I would say if your pattern is looser, try braids and if it’s tighter do twists!

H2O and ready to go 

So I’ve been meaning to share this with you all- water is essential to healthy living. As an avid water drinker, I believe that everyone should be drinking at least half of your body weight in ounces. I normally drink about 3/4 of my body weight and I will explain a little later why I do, but you should too!

  • how’d this happen

As a child, I would drink at least 8 ounces of V8 Splash every morning. I stopped doing that around the age of 13, around the time puberty started kicking in. I got a few pimples, and my aunt told me if I stopped drinking pop and juice, my skin would clear up. So I stopped. I never went back to drinking those drinks, except occasionally I do have a pop if I’m craving sugar. Other than that, I rarely drink anything besides water. I love it- it keeps me healthy and the benefits are endless. I drink about 100 ounces of water a day, which is a little short of a gallon (20 ounces off). It’s room temperature water- I stopped drinking cold water years ago (it’s too cold lol).

  • why so much water

So after I started drinking just water I drank a fairly normal 64 ounces a day. I didn’t start drinking 80 +ounces or so until I got to tenth grade. As you all know, I have eczema in my scalp and my hair was falling out. I read online if you increase your water intake it’ll help your hair grow and that’s all I needed to here. I would literally force myself to drink the water, knowing that it would be good for me. And ever since then I have drunk a lot of water. As I’ve gotten older I have started to drink more and more water, mostly because I’m used to drinking so much adding another glass doesn’t make a difference.

  • benefits

The benefits of drinking water are endless. It helps regulate your digestive system, grows your hair and nails out, clears your skin, flushes out toxins and most of all- it makes you healthy. Chapped lips are a sign of dehydration- so my lips are always moisturized.  It’s easy to increase your water intake- just swap out a juice for a water. The process of getting used to drinking so much water is a little time consuming- you’ll have to use the bathroom often, but it’s so worth it. Drinking water helps everything get better. So just remember that drinking a little bit more will help!